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There is a template of living in her realm, in addition to goodness. Hospitality and courtesy. Elegance & comfort too, she's an interior decorator. Unpleasantness is not ignored, merely hit head on with clear eyes, thinking, action, moving forward to joy.
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Community activist, one charitable group she formed, decades ago, has raised significant funds, all plowed back into her community. Book club, bible study group, & more......she's active
Of course our Garden Design work begins with lunch in the sunroom overlooking the garden. Homemade chicken salad over lettuce, designer chips, crisp saltines marinated overnite in Tabasco/red pepper flakes/powdered ranch dressing, and iced tea.
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Conversation.
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Life lessons arrive to each, I've been fortunate, having many arrive in exactly this manner.
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With a wicked smile she said, "Hope you don't mind I shared your divorce story with a friend." She knew I wouldn't mind. My story needs to be shared. Victim of alcoholic excesses with 30 year spouse, blah-ti-boring-blah, it is the pivot from victim to survivor, which is a terrible location to be stuck too, to thriver, and how it was achieved that must be told. But not here today. I have a new story from her.
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Her friend, long married, had finally reached a court date for divorce. Wealthy, her husband was armed with Atlanta's best lawyer, and she was about to tank financially. An amazing choice was made, from the bible. She chose 10 of her closest friends who knew she, and her soon to be divorced husband, long and well. She wanted her best girlfriends to stand with her, in court, to give her strength & love, and more importantly, bear witness.
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As all of these ladies, matriarchs all, filed into the court room, to sit with their friend, and look her husband in the eyes, he was vanquished. He became flushed, and fidgety. A jury of his peers, indeed. Hushed words with his lawyer.
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The divorce settled equitably that day. No one was taken advantage of, no one harmed financially.
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This woman used precepts of her longtime bible study, her only ammunition, and Providence smiled. She chose not to be afraid, and put her faith in G*d.
If this were a tv movie of the week, the script would be stupid.
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Instead, passing along the story, is strength. Victim hood is a choice. Hope is not foolish. Bearing witness is a tool. Do not be afraid to ask for help.
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After lunch we had desert, vanilla ice cream with Hershey's chocolate, 2 little cubes of homemade brownies, and a large red ripe strawberry with dollop of chocolate on top.
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Then I designed her backyard, and left with a check.
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Love my job.
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Garden & Be Well, XO Tara
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Top pic, Bassett Furniture, bottom pic Ralph Lauren.
